Hey Big Spender

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It’s a brand nude day. Don’t call me bashful but I am blushing a little bit over the beauty of this soft pink creme. This is “Shape of My Heart” by Deborah Lippmann.

I scored an extra special treat at my birthday swap: my very own bottle of Deborah Lippmann! This is a name I have heard the Nailluminati toss about like a shuttlecock, and every time it dances over my head I see its price tag streaming behind it. Even if I were a millionaire it would not be in the budget. You don’t pay for canned peaches without a coupon, and you don’t buy $18 nail polish when there are $0.99 bottles waiting faithfully for you at the drug store. It’s the principle of the thing. So imagine the rush I felt when this appeared on my table. I didn’t offer it to anyone else (birthday dibs), which is probably the closest I will ever come to looting.

Shape of My Heart is a healthy blush creme that comes in a dainty glass cube with a medium-width brush. The 5-Free formula glides on the nail, streaks a tad, but self-levels. After three coats I still had VNL but that adds to the charm of the color. Indoors it is a mild-mannered pink but out the sunlight it keeps giving me a vivid cherry blossom vibe. That means it plays well with everyone but still refuses to fade into the background. I respect that.

This About Sums It Up: It feels super exclusive to apply a high-end nail color, like winning concert tickets on the radio or being allowed to see how the Muppets on Sesame Street work. But when all is said and done it is still paint in a bottle. So try not to let the experience go to your head. Granted it is 5-Free which is better for the planet. If you helped someone today and ate all your vegetables then I give you permission to treat yo’self!

Nailluminati Status: Big $pender Level achieved. At no cost to me! Mwahahaha.

What’s the most you have ever spent or would ever spend on a bottle of nail polish? Tell me in the comments!

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About Abbi Crutchfield

Abbi Crutchfield is a comedian and host of You Can Do Better on truTV. She has been featured on NBC, VH1, CollegeHumor and in national commercials. She is a contributor to Someecards, and her jokes are listed among the Best Tweets of the Year by Huffington Post Comedy. She is a UCB alum and produces the popular stand-up hour The Living Room Show weekly in Brooklyn.
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